Hollow doesn't begin to describe...

~Friday, Jul. 19, 2002~

...how I'm feeling at the moment. I know I should be angry. I know I should be hurt. But, oddly enough, I'm neither. Oh, there is a bit of both, but mostly, nothing. It's like though I know what's happened is a bad thing, and there are aspects of it that seriously bother me, I also know that things could have been worse and they'll work out as they should. So why cause more needless stress and strain? And besides, with all the shit I've been through in my life, this is small potatoes. I know I'll be alright. I'm a bit tough girl, I can tie my own sandals...

But at the same time... I'm sure that once this empty feeling passes, and the emotions come back I might not feel so blase about it, but you never know.

I do have more doubts than I did when I woke up this morning. Quite a bit more. Are they valid? I don't know. Some might be. Some more than likely not. Only time will really tell.

Even now I'm sitting here, trying to figure out how I feel and what I'm thinking, and all I'm getting is a blank. So I think that's Aset's way of telling me to just be at the moment.

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