Randomness

~Sept. 28, 2002~

I haven't been able to focus on a damned thing today. And only part of that is because I feel like I'm just this side of the walking dead.

Didn't sleep well last night, though I can't really say why not. Something just didn't feel right, as if the me on a different plane of existance was in strife and the me in this plane felt it. I wonder if she can feel how awfully sick I am.

At work my mind constantly wandered off of the forecasts I had to write. No real destination for it, it just decided to amble away. And when it got where it decided it was going, it shut down. Next thing I knew, I was being woken up by my tech. We decided that I should probably go home early today and get some more sleep.

Driving home was almost as bad. Nothing beats a constant pace at a constant temperature to lull your brain into shutting down again. Thank Aset for those areas to stop in on the side of the Tange. Just wish there was one next to Dante's Lake that I could have stopped at and strolled over there.

Dante's Lake... How that lake could have inspired the man to organize Hell after it's shape I'll never know. It's actually quite a site. Until you get close to it. And sadly, that's the way most things around here are. As long as you don't get too close, everything is stunning, beautiful, awe inspiring, etc. But once you're up close, and you can see the trash, and the grease, and the oil, everything is tarnished.

Huh, that's a pretty good summation of how I'm feeling right at the moment. "She looks great from a distance, but don't get too close..." Today I've really been feeling the wear of the last two years. I was so tired today. My joints actually ache from how tired I am at the moment. And I know that as soon as I put my head on the pillow I'll be asleep. Even with the nap I took this afternoon, which was such a heavy sleep, aside from the lost time, I'm not even sure it happened.

On a good note, though, not that today has been entirely bad. It actually wasn't, except for me feeling like crude... Anyway, I chatted with Raevyn this morning and that was nice. We had a delightful chat about her new bunny, which I'm happy she got. And, in one day, by two people I don't know, I was, in a sense, called unforgettable, and interesting. Both of those made me smile which felt good. Thank you.

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