2 years past...

~Sept. 11, 2003~

Once again, an anniversary for death. An anniversary for what will be remember as, perhaps, the single worst tragedy in the American history. An anniversary for a lot of things. I�m sure there will be those that just wish this day would stop being so important, and those that wish they could prolong it, draw it out. Than there will be those in between. I�m one of those in between people.

To be quite honest, I had completely forgotten what today was until Sam asked what time the memorial service here on base was. Than when I remembered, I was surprised that I had forgotten, and even a bit ashamed of myself. How could I possibly forget something so monumental that only happened 2 years ago? How could I forget the day Ed died, the day we went in to a war that�s never ending? How could I forget the day we were attacked?

Easily. It doesn�t effect my normal, everyday life. 2 years ago, for a span of time, yes, it did effect things. I couldn�t escape it, the effects of the attack were everywhere. On TV, in the stores, on the way to work, at work. Everything was different. It�s not like that now, though. Things have calmed down some and are mostly back to what may as well be considered normal. So I forgot.

And yet I�m still ashamed that I forgot. Like I�m not being a good citizen by forgetting. But what good does it do remembering and dwelling on it? All that�s gotten us is a war without end, the destruction of a once beautiful and almost ethereal city, more death, more hate, more angry words, more paranoia and the remained freedom of the man behind it all. 2 years.

I don�t fully disagree with what we�ve done in retaliation, but I don�t fully agree with it either. I�m sure there could have been things done to handle it better, to actually accomplish some things but there�s nothing to be done about it now. We can�t change the actions we�ve taken in the past. But at least we could learn from them, right? It�s becoming painfully apparent that we can�t.

I wrote Ed�s family recently. They were a bit surprised to hear from me, and I think, at first, they didn�t know who I was. After reading further in the letter I explained who I was and reminded them in the tape we made for them who I was. I received a card back from them saying thank you and that they were really touched by my writing. I was actually quite surprised by they�re reply. They said they harbored no ill feelings anymore towards those responsible for his death. They had gotten past their hate and anger, though they still mourn their loss, and celebrate Ed�s life.

They no longer hated Bin Laden. The parents of a young man killed during all this no longer hated the man that was behind his death. Why can�t this be the case for everyone? Why can�t we all just accept each other�s differences rather than fear and lash out at them? I know the US will never get to this point with Bin Laden, probably not even if he�s caught and tried and executed. Nor will Bin Laden ever get beyond his religious fervor, which was the driving force behind it.

And that�s why we sit here today, having a memorial service for 4 planes that crashed, 2 towers that fell, 1 building almost destroyed, and dozens of rescue workers that died while trying to clean up someone else�s mess that became their own. And now it�s all of our mess to clean up. I only hope we do a better job than we�ve done in the past�

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