Truly sick, or just trying to get out of helping?

~Oct. 06, 2002~

The last couple of days, have been nerve wracking, and seriously NOT good for my health. And the biggest part of it is I'm not sure if one of my "good" friends is really a friend at all.

What do you do when you're suddenly put in a very rough situation, needing someone to watch your kids for a day, on very very short notice. You ask a friend, and she says she'll do it, no problem. You also ask her if she'll watch them for a couple hours while you go to a meeting that has just been called, on your day off, and you have to be there. She says no problem, so you think nothing more of it.

When the meetings over, you call and let her know you're on the way home, as it's gone a lot longer than you thought, you ask how things have gone, and she says "we'll talk about it when you get here." So instantly you know it's not good.

Well, you get there and find both your kids crying, that one of them has been acting up, and your friend thinks that one of them is a threat to her 5 month old, meerly based on jealousy and being a normal 2 year old. She says that if you can't find someone else to take them for the day, she'll do it and manage somehow, but she'd rather not.

I called another friend, Kim, and she said she had plans with her husband the night she would be watching them, so the time crunch would just be too much, and no, she couldn't watch them. So I called M back and told her, and she said alright, she'd take them.

The next night, after work, while playing with the boys, I called her to find out if she wanted to watch them at her place, or come over to mine. She professes to be very ill, to the point she can't even get up to clean up her babies puke, she's afraid to pick him up, she's running a fever, etc. So she' can't watch them the next day. So I was than stuck without anyone to watch the boys.

I got lucky. Very lucky. Kim called shortly thereafter, well, almost immediately when I hung up, and asked if I still needed her. They had decided not to go after all so that her husband could be a vegetable this weekend. I explained what happened, and wsa in the car to go get her a few minutes later. She watched the boys, had little to no trouble, and I took her home after work on Friday, and made it back home safely, though not sure how, as I was falling asleep at the wheel.

Yesterday, while cleaning the house, yes, I was cleaning, M calls, and wants to chat. I ask how she's doing, and she's now feeling just fine. Just fine. She said her daughter was now sick, but that she and her son were doing great.

Now, to me, this seems like a case of convienently being sick to get out of something. And that really pisses me off. She knows I wouldn't have asked unless it was really important and I had no other choice. She knows I hate asking people, friends, family, whoever, for help, and knows how tough it was me asking her. She could have just said no at the beginning. But see, the thing is, she had come up with the idea to be my daycare provider so that they could have a bit more extra money. I asked if she thought she could handle them, with her son and daughter, and she had no doubt that she could. Well, guess she can't.

I know that a lot of people aren't prepared in any way shape or form for my boys, but they're NOT bad kids. Yes, they're twins. Yes, they're two. Yes, they're boys. Thus, they are prone to act like two year old twin boys. Difficult at times, loud, energetic, tough to handle but also with all the good points as well. And, here's something odd. They're usually better behaved for others than for me. And they're more loving than most kids I've come across.

I have my thoughts on why things went they way they did. And I have no doubt that on a normal day, things would have been different. But whatever. I now have a "friend" that I can't stop thinking was "sick" to get out of something she said she'd do to help me. How shitty is that?

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